10/26/06: Ticks (1993)What’s generally dismissed as the ’80s direct-to-video horror boom lasted well into the ’90s.
Ticks is a swell example, coming along late enough to feature a pre-
Austin Powers Seth Green as its nerdy hero. We also get Ami Dolenz—daughter of
Mickey—as a horny teen, plus conservative role model
Alfonso Ribeiro as a street youth dragged along with other kids for a deadly camping trip.
Unlike other giant bug movies, the titular terrors of
Ticks aren’t created by funding cuts or big businessmen. Our young heroes get terrorized because of marijuana farmers. There’s a thriving community of them near the campground, and one of the creeps—in a stellar turn by Clint Howard—is an inbred genius when it comes to steroids. He’s using them to raise himself a killer crop of pot.
Too bad that the steroids are also creating a bunch of mutated oversized ticks. Of course, it wouldn’t be much of a movie if the steroids weren’t doing something. We’re not the first to note that
Ticks is packing a pretty big metaphor. It’s also pleasant just to see some evil pot farmers. Those colorful spreads in
High Times always leave out the firearms that are such a vital part of the trade.
Still, we initially thought
Ticks was providing a simple right-wing indulgence. Then we added up the body count. At the end of the film, we’ve got more teens being murdered by pot dealers than are consumed by giant ticks. This might be the most realistic film made during the ’90s.
Ticks has some flaws, though. It’s obvious that director Tony Randel didn’t get to finish shooting the movie. Our man Alfonso also goes through a lot of grief. It’s a nice departure from
Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, but you can’t help but remember that Will Smith was starring in
Six Degrees of Separation that same year. Smith, however, will never get to match Alfonso’s death scene.
Make it your own: Speaking of bloodsuckers—nobody’s bothered to release
Ticks on DVD, most likely because they’re hoping that Randel will get around to finishing the film.
VHS copies are getting kind of pricey.
