8/26/08: King Kong vs. Godzilla (1962)We don’t know why the United Nations has sent a submarine to some polar region, but they’ve unearthed the destructive force known as Godzilla. Nice going, United Nations. Hard to believe your forces will only become more boneheaded. Anyway, it’s 1962, so Godzilla’s still the scourge of Tokyo. The overgrown radioactive lizard immediately starts strolling back to Japan. The government’s big idea is to try what worked so well back in 1945, and drop an atomic bomb on their own country. Godzilla treads ever closer, and the bigger question looms: Who will save the day?
The answer is Ichiro Arishima, who stars in
King Kong vs. Godzilla as the bumbling Mr. Tako. We first see him spazzing out like Jerry Lewis in
The Nutty Lizard Food, pulling at his hair while watching televised footage of Godzilla stomping on tanks. He turns to a roomful of employees. “I’m
sick of Godzilla,” he declares in dubbed glory. “Send a wire immediately—I want my own monster! Find me a monster, fast!”
It turns out that Mr. Tako runs the Pacific Pharmaceutical empire. He’s soon got two comical corporate lackeys—one savvy, one cowardly—running off to Faro Island. Maybe “faro” means “skull” in Japanese, because the flunkies soon discover King Kong. First, however, they endear themselves to the local natives by handing out cigarettes to the adults—and one insistent kid. (“You better not smoke it at home,” advises the savvy one.)
King Kong conveniently drinks himself into a stupor after defeating a giant octopus. The proud employees of Pacific Pharmaceutical start boating back to Japan with the unconscious ape in tow (still passed out on a giant raft). Mr. Tako helicopters down to the ship (proclaiming “Banzai!”) and is thrilled enough to alert the media. We cut to one of those English-speaking newscasts that are always used to help translate the action in a Godzilla film. The reporter explains that Kong has been captured, and that “Mr. Tako claims ownership for himself and the Pacific Pharmaceutical Company.”
So how is Mr. Tako rewarded? A military representative boards the boat, and asks who’s responsible for Kong. “I am,” Mr. Tako proudly replies. “My company owns him.”
It turns out that the Japanese government—the same geniuses planning to nuke their own country—is forbidding him from bringing Kong to Japan. He doesn’t handle the news very well. “My contracts,” moans Mr. Tako. “My television commitments.”
Mr. Tako’s employees aren’t sympathetic. They’ve been stuck at sea long enough for Kong to finally regain consciousness. They want to blow up the dynamite they placed on Kong’s raft as a safety measure. Mr. Tako tries to stop them. “King Kong is my responsibility,” he shouts, “and you have no right to destroy him!” Mr. Tako’s rebellious employees accuse him of only caring about publicity. As it turns out, Kong’s just fine after the dynamite’s finally set off—although he doesn’t seem to enjoy getting wet.
Another newscast then explains that Kong is heading to Tokyo on his own. As one reporter explains, “It appears King Kong is sensing the presence of a hated enemy.” Plus, we wouldn’t have much of a movie if Kong headed over to the Bahamas.
Mr. Tako follows King Kong to the first big conformation with Godzilla. He isn’t bowing down to the government, either. A military guard stops his motorcade as Mr. Tako gets close to the action. “I represent Tokyo Television and Pacific Pharmaceutical,” Mr. Tako explains. “King Kong is under my supervision.”
If this movie was made today, that kind of arrogance—along with running a pharmaceutical company—would get Mr. Tako crushed under Kong’s foot. That’s not the case here. We’ll later see that Mr. Tako is truly committed to Kong, even after the ape’s first disappointing battle with Godzilla. Mr. Tako is even genuinely disturbed when he learns that the military is hoping that both monsters will die in their next confrontation. He also won’t gloat when the military starts relying on Kong as a last resort against Godzilla.
Mr. Tako is more than a capitalist hero. He’s a pretty good guy. He won’t even fire those employees who defied him and tried to blow up King Kong—and they’ll learn the value of good publicity before the movie’s over. Of course, we’re skipping over plenty of fun moments that make
King Kong vs. Godzilla a classic monster movie. We certainly won’t give away the ending. Let’s just note that it’s a happy one for Pacific Pharmaceutical, and what’s happy for Pacific Pharmaceutical is happy for Japan.
Make it your own: You might as well get
the DVD package of
King Kong vs. Godzilla and 1963’s
King Kong Escapes. The second one—featuring Commies and Mechani-Kong—is pretty good.
Here’s our recent entry on
Godzilla vs. the Smog Monster, which is from the years when Godzilla was a good guy. And let’s seem a little precious and add that Ichiro Arishima was a truly great comic actor whose performance as Mr. Tako is kind of mangled in the American version. Still, it’s nice that he got the exposure.
