While assembling the entry for the Five Best Conservative Porn Films, I was listening to Kris Kristofferson—specifically, a reissue of 1990’s Third World Warrior. I’m comfortable with respecting Kristofferson as an important songwriter, but this album has to be the daffiest Leftist pr0n ever recorded. The lyrics didn’t really creep up on me until “Don’t Let The Bastards (Get You Down),” but I was soon marveling at the idiocy of songs like “Jesse Jackson” and “Sandinista.” You might forgive certain poised punks for celebrating Sandinistas back in 1980. Kristofferson, however, was a grown man by 1989. Maybe it was brave to write these songs at the end of the Reagan era, but it would’ve been equally brave for Kristofferson to cook up some Pop Tarts in the comfort of his hot tub. Actually, Third World Warrior sounds like Kristofferson was cooking up some Pop Tarts in his bong.

 

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