RightWingTrash

"NASA, NASCAR, whatever..."

2010-03-05T18:35:00Z

Remember a few weeks ago when a pompous academic made an ass out of himself while commenting on the shootings at the University of Alabama Huntsville, but then everyone forgot about it because it was just passing idiocy that couldn't be fanatically politicized? As it turns out, there isn't anything I can't fanatically politicize.

Mr. Responsibility

2010-02-18T03:55:00Z

Here’s my Kim Fowley interview, just in time for that biopic about The Runaways and some fine reissues of his early studio productions. Anyone not familiar with Fowley will find his interesting history helpfully covered in the article. Not much politics here, but you’ll see that the guy isn’t kidding himself when he claims to be politically incorrect.

It’s a music magazine…

2010-02-18T03:49:00Z

These nice young men are the members of Atreyu, who aren’t a particular inventive metalcore act. I wrote a review of them recently, but skipped the most admirable thing about the band—as seen in a December 2009 interview with Revolver magazine. The band dares to include the article in their press kit, despite some fun quotes from frontman Alex Varkatzas. His political lyrics lean towards general disgust, but certain conservatives (and horror fans) will admire how Varkatzas openly expresses his love for a certain Springfield XD-45:

It’s a semiautomatic 45-caliber handgun—a beautiful, lightweight piece of firepower. When the swine flu broke out, I found myself looking at my copy of 28 Days Later and I’m, like, Sonofabitch. What if we all start turning into zombies and I don’t have a gun! So I went out, bought this gun, and learned how to shoot. If you’re a zombie, or if you’re thinking of breaking into my house, I will shoot you in the f**king face.

Downer

2010-02-11T15:02:00Z

I know it’s been a while since I posted, but Karol Sheinin just had a baby. I haven’t gone to visit her or anything. In fact, it’s a completely lame excuse, but no more embarrassing than admitting that I’ve read an article in the new issue of Esquire. Honestly, I was waiting for a tow truck. One thing still stood out to me, and I should jump on it while other conservatives are having fun laughing at Roger Ebert.

This latest issue of Esquire has a pretty good profile of the noted film critic who’s been in terrible health. Personally, the only thing I ever liked about Ebert was how often his syndicated reviews put local film critics out of business. I gave up on At the Movies back when Ebert (& Gene Siskel) kept dismissing cool films in their “Dog of the Week” segment. It’s only been recently that Ebert’s been pitching himself for loving obituaries by becoming a shrill Leftist idiot.

Anyway, Chris Jones’ profile—titled “The Last Words of Roger Ebert"—has this one inadvertently hilarious anecdote about the guy (brackets are mine):

He took his hardest hit not long ago. After [equally petty Leftist film critic Richard] Roeper announced his departure from At the Movies in 2008—Disney wanted to revamp the show in a way that Roeper felt would damage it [and Roeper’s ego]—Ebert disassociated himself from it, too, and he took his trademarked thumbs with him. The end was not pretty and the break was not clean. But because Disney was going to change the original balcony set as part of its makeover, it was agreed, Ebert thought, that the upholstered chair and rails and undersized screen would be given to the Smithsonian and put on display. Ebert was excited by the idea. Then he went up to visit the old set one last time and found it broken up and stacked in a dumpster in the alley.

Ebert seriously believed that anyone cared about At the Movies after Siskel died. How touching. The best part, though, is how the above story is just like a scene from 2002’s About Schmidt. That comedy/drama is subtly conservative, and you can get a clue about that from reading Ebert’s review. He liked About Schmidt, but you can see that the main thing Ebert took from the movie was disdain for the average working man—even a fairly successful insurance executive. Ebert probably spends a lot of time rereading his old reviews. Maybe he’ll stumble across that one someday, and marvel at how little he’s learned about his own life.

New Wave

2010-01-22T14:24:00Z

It’s kind of weird that Scott Brown’s big win in Massachusetts has inspired a Digney Fingus revival. That’s courtesy of the prudes at The Huffington Post, who are upset that Brown’s wife starred in the video to “The Girl With The Curious Hand”—which was certainly one of the better songs being played in the bad clubs of 1984. But also consider that Scott Brown’s victory was hailed by Jim Skafish. If you don’t know who Skafish is, you can proceed from that link to his website. Then marvel at how Obama has lost the psychic punk pioneer vote.

While it’s still January, let’s also plug one of last year’s more conservative albums. Steve Lee’s I Like Guns (on Revolver Records) may look like a punk act’s attempt to make fun of mid-America. Lee’s actually Australian, and a dedicated outdoorsman when he isn’t fronting the roots-rocking band The Lee’s. Here’s the video for the knowledgeable title track, in which Lee also strikes a blow for the environment. You can sample the rest of the album here—and it’s a shame that I never did a Christmas gift guide. Valentine’s Day is coming up, though, and the truth is that Steve Lee loves guns.

Some Interesting Things Not Found Here

2010-01-11T14:19:00Z

I'm still not convinced that Tucker Carlson is a conservative, but he certainly did the right thing by hiring Jim Treacher to blog at the new The Daily Caller. Meanwhile, there's still some New Year's Eve activity over at McBeardo.com, where he's doing a fine job listing plenty of the worst things about this past decade. Naturally, that includes some Leftist idiocy. McBeardo is pretty much apolitical, but pop culture sure isn't. Finally, here's an article where I celebrate a very short-lived cinematic phenomenon where a bunch of teenagers got together and had a good time without acting like it was some kind of big hipster deal. That's something we didn't get much of in the past decade.

Pretend We’re Dead—2009

2010-01-05T14:23:00Z

Like the other list posted today, this one has been published elsewhere. I can’t find the article online, though. That’s obviously because it’s the kind of important deep thinking that gets hidden behind a subscriber’s firewall. Anyway, here’s…

The Ten Most Overrated Albums of 2009

In case you missed the awards ceremony, my Overrated Albums list for 2008 was chosen by Popdose.com as the Best Overrated Albums List of the Year. My acceptance speech went like this: “I’ve been ripped off so much that the thing’s become a goddamn category?” Now the idea of writing about the Overrated Albums of 2009 seems overrated itself. Besides, the critics and fans showed some restraint this year. R. Kelly’s wretched new album got the respect it deserved. Nobody got too excited over Sonic Youth’s The Eternal, either. It received the good reviews you’d expect for the best Concrete Blonde album of the year.

But, as always, there was plenty of hype handed out to the undeserving—made more tragic by gullible music fans who are too lazy to seek out all the quality acts that litter the internet. The worst albums were by this crowd, made even more irritating by popular acclaim…

The Pains of Being Pure of Heart: The Pains of Being Pure of Heart (Slumberland)
Mom and Dad getting divorced, and your older brother got dibs on rebelling to death metal? And your sister is old enough to have hogged everything by The Belle and Sebastian? Here’s some passive pre-adolescent pop with flaccid riffs that’ll put you on your own path to bad decisions—likely leading to starring in scatological porn that isn’t even made in Germany.

Phoenix: Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix (Glass Note)
a-ha announced they’re breaking up this year, and Phoenix is probably why. No aging act can compete with a full boy-band experience modeled after The Pretenders, Adam Ant, and lesser new-wave acts. At least Phoenix perfectly captures the most irritating aspects of new-wave. Meanwhile, the fine Frenchmen of Poni Hoax go unheard. That makes them the only Frenchmen who deserve to complain about stupid Americans.

Wavves: Wavvves (Fat Possum)
Douse yourself in Axe Body Spray and enjoy Wavves as ’90s punk-pop dumbed down (yes, even more) for aging frat guys who pine for emo music worthy of a sports bar jukebox. Don’t forget to admire how Nathan Williams combines the arrogance of Bono with the toothy obliviousness of Clay Aiken. It's like watching that Germs biopic if Darby Crash was played by Dane Cook.

The Avett Brothers: I and Love and You (American)
They looked ready for the Disney Channel at the start of the decade, or at least a remake of Adventures of the Wilderness Family. Then the Avett Brothers’ mix of emo and Americana caught the eye of Rick Rubin, who groomed them for the glossy debut of I and Love and You—where, as feared, the humble backwoods act was turned into the house band that Rubin should’ve used for Reba McEntire’s hipster makeover.

Bell X1: Blue Lights on the Runway (Yep Roc)
The Irishmen of Bell X1 are so white that ACORN should be financing them a new Cadillac. Bell X1 is so white that the moronic praise for the wispy pop of Blue Lights on the Runway should skip the Talking Heads comparisons and cite DEVO as the band’s personal James Brown. Any woman who can dance to Bell X1 probably used to attend the John Phillips Day Care Center. I’m not even sure what that last line means, but it can’t possibly be as unfunny as the idea that any young person has been listening to Bell X1 and thinking, “Yeah, get down on it.”

Wilco: Wilco (The Album) (Nonesuch)
These guys would be retired to the Overrated Hall of Fame if the cornball lite-rock of Wilco (The Album) hadn’t been accompanied by this year’s Ashes of American Flags (the documentary). The footage followed our dullard heroes while they played small Southern venues and whined incessantly about the corporatization of the American landscape. They have no clue that they’re the Olive Garden of Americana.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs: It’s Blitz! (Interscope)
Their dance-pop got tired long ago, but It’s Blitz! is where ’80s-throwback Karen O got desperate enough to insist that the Yeah Yeah Yeahs’ music “almost feels like a John Hughes ’80s movie.” In an awesome display of survival, Hughes waited five months before dropping dead from embarrassment.

Green Day: 21st Century Breakdown (Reprise)
Billie Joe and his supporting cast have made an album that is entirely interchangeable with Bon Jovi’s The Circle—except Jon Bon Jovi never committed the sin of giving aging punks something to actually be right about when complaining about pathetic sell-outs. Bon Jovi would probably also be too embarrassed to be caught rhyming “hero” and “zero.”

Jay-Z: The Blueprint 3 (Roc Nation)
He’s still the Madonna of rap, with Jay-Z working busy dance beats under the auspices of a brand name that’s mysteriously respected. His jet-setting socialite days have also turned him into the white Ashton Kutcher. This one is the blueprint too far, with the busy businessman working through a checklist of hip-hop clichés while sounding as tired as Humpty Hump on an oldies tour.

The Dirty Projectors: Bitte Orca (Domino)
A discordant opening track turned The Dirty Projectors into critics’ darlings. Then the reviewers had to ignore the rest of Bitte Orca, including the sappy soul music and the cutesy Americana—not to mention the uninspired hip-hop. Then the critics faced the daunting task of deciding whether it’s cooler to rank Dirty Projectors above or below Kelly Clarkson. Math is hard!

The Best Five Albums of 2009 by Artists Filed Under "M"

2010-01-05T14:01:00Z

I'm not sure why my five favorite albums of 2009 are by artists whose last names begin with "M." I can only suspect that it has something to do with why those brainwashed kiddies were chanting, "Barack Obama--mmmmm, mmmmm, mmmmm." Unlike those schoolchildren, though, only one of my favorite artists got a lot of play on YouTube. That's why I've included brief notes of introduction. There's not much in the way of political content, though—except for a song on that Tris McCall album which tells the sad story of a potentially good politician who can't work in the Democratic Party's machine. And I don't want to freak out everybody too much, but my sixth favorite album of 2009 starts with "N."

Don McGlashan & the Seven Sisters: Marvellous Year (Arch Hill)
The former New Zealand new-waver (Blam Blam Blam) also fronted a great rootsy rock band (The Mutton Birds) before launching a sporadic solo career that's kind of rootsy new-wave. It was a good year for his fans, since McGlashan also landed two great tunes on the sprawling 2-disc 7 Worlds Collide compilation.

Adam Marsland: Go West (Karma Frog)
As reviewed here, and you can already order his soon-to-be-very-scarce new album here.

Tris McCall: Let the Night Fall (Melody Lanes)
He spent the past decade chronicling NYC's post-9/11 musical scene, with Tris McCall as a perfectly timid Everyman trying to rock hard in the classic pop style while embracing hip-hop. This is his first album in ten years without a strong rap influence. That must mean something.

McGinty & White: ...Sing Selections from the McGinty & White Songbook (no label)
Two veteran NYC scenesters cuddle up together in a cold world where their lovely and whimsical pop tunes are out of fashion. Even the "Wichita Lineman" cover is interesting, though they probably flipped a coin over Jimmy Webb or Lee Hazlewood.

Mitchel Musso: Mitchel Musso (Walt Disney)
The first really great album from a Radio Disney act comes from a skinny big-nosed kid who looks like Zac Efron's comic relief. Musso also shows up with Ashley Tisdale on the Phineas and Ferb: Songs from the Hit Disney TV Series soundtrack. That would've made the list if so many of the songs weren't from 2008. Also, I'm also still upset about Ashley getting her nose done.

The Top Ten Films That Didn’t Piss Me Off in 2009

2010-01-04T03:19:00Z

It’s embarrassing to remember each January that everyone else has finished their year-end (and, in this case, decade-end) lists as I’m just hacking out mine. Fortunately, my past editors have always indulged my rule that I never work the last two weeks of a year. I’m certainly not going to give myself a hard time over coming in late.

Anyway, here’s my ten favorite films of 2009 that didn’t require rationalizing when Leftist sentiments showed up in the script. That’s with one exception, but you won’t be able to tell if that’s my very favorite film of 2009. The following isn’t in any particular order. Lists are already embarrassing enough—although I’ll have another one up by Wednesday...

Inglorious Basterds
No surprise here, but it was fun to see how Quentin Tarantino took the momentum of his art film Death Proof—from the doomed Grindhouse project—and used several tricks from it to create a proper blockbuster. Also, it seems many hippie film critics have died off since the release of Saving Private Ryan. We didn’t get nearly as many reviews comparing Inglorious Basterds to those silly old John Wayne films.

Fired Up!
Finally, a teenage sex comedy without clingy virgins. Fired Up! has heroes who are football players enjoying plenty of sex—but still ready to give up football in favor of being surrounded by girls in teenager camp. Token Leftist moment: they’re supportive of lesbian cheerleaders. That certainly makes for a big tent.

Drag Me to Hell
This one divided horror fans dramatically. I was perfectly horrified by the scary stuff, and never really minded the comedic touches. Also, I support any film where our heroine is a banker tormented by a sleazy old woman who doesn’t care about paying her mortgage. (To provide balance, I’ll note that I wasn’t scared by Paranormal Activity, but it was a pretty good TV-movie for the big screen. It should’ve first aired on NBC as a special Halloween night episode of Dateline.)

Orphan
It was already promising that a horror movie was willing to piss off non-judgmental types by suggesting that having no parents might lead to a screwed-up kid. The Orphan then went skipping off in several defiant directions. The whole thing was sordid and nihilistic enough to have been directed by Ted Post.

Astro Boy
While the American film industry was wracked with guilt, the Japanese used atomic power as the basis for creating a really keen cartoon character back in 1951. Hollywood did a surprisingly good job of updating the futurist hero for 2009. Astro Boy is a pretty standard tale of a son being forsaken by his father, dying, and then returning to life through his sacrifice for others. You also get moronic would-be Commie robots, plus plenty of Randian moments. That’s probably best summed up when Astro Boy (still learning he’s an artificial boy) rejects Immanuel Kant in favor of studying Leonardo da Vinci.

To be fair, the idiotic Commie robots are mainly a rip-off from The Life of Brian. Also, Astro Boy features an annoying President who seems to be a perfect cliché of everything the Left loathes in George W. Bush. That’s probably the kind of indulgence that filmmakers have to include while making a movie about a little boy who believes in saying grace before dinner. On a personal note, “Secret Agent Man” came on the oldies radio station while I was driving my son to see Astro Boy. I didn’t comment on the song at the time, but I noticed he was still singing it to himself as we went into the theater. This bodes well for my plan to essentially raise the kid in 1966.

The Vampire’s Assistant
…as very recently discussed here, and I can’t believe this and Astro Boy both bombed so badly.

My Bloody Valentine 3-D
Friday the 13th
Two remales of classic slasher films—with My Bloody Valentine 3-D improving on the original, and Friday the 13th just being surprisingly fun (and not-so-surprisingly conservative, as explained here). Both films pull off a clever trick of retelling the original story in the opening minutes, and the new My Bloody Valentine had an opening credits sequence that did more with 3-D than Avatar could. There’s no real conservative content to My Bloody Valentine 3-D, but I’ll note that lead actor Kerr Smith once agreed with me that his career suffers because he reminds Hollywood types of the jocks that terrorized them in high school. Even playing a gay teen on Dawson’s Creek couldn’t fix that.

Pontypool
My favorite part of any zombie movie is the slow build to people figuring out that the world has changed around them. Not surprisingly, Zombieland skipped nearly all of that good stuff. Pontypool found a new twist, with a bitter disc jockey piecing together the terror while working out of his crappy little radio station. It might not really be correct to call Pontypool a zombie film, but it sure played like a classic one in a year where zombies were essentially an in-joke. This Canadian production—technically a 2008 release—is also part of what’s been a recent quiet comeback for veteran genre actor Stephen McHattie, who also showed up in 2012 and Watchmen.

The Hurt Locker
It’s on the list because anyone has to concede that The Hurt Locker is great suspenseful filmmaking. The script also understands the importance of military rank in a war story. Conservatives were even right to be excited that someone had made a film about the war in Iraq that actually found fault in America’s enemy. That kind of thing counts as a big deal now. I still don’t like movies that depict American soldiers as death junkies, and The Hurt Locker might as well have ended with our hero shooting up in an alleyway.

Outro '09

2009-12-19T04:41:00Z

You can't get more off-blog than I've managed over the past week. I didn't even manage to hack out a clever Hanukkah posting that would've also set up some assorted Year's Best/Decade's Best entries. I am indeed blessed to blame all my negligence on deadlines, which I'll continue to concentrate on through the rest of the month. I'll need a distraction, though, and I'll be giving thought to plenty of Year End/Decade End lists that I'll start posting on January 1st. They might not be interesting, but it'll be a decent summary of entertainment that doesn't contain stupid Leftist messages. Not that I can't enjoy the occasional Leftist message, of course. I'm tolerant, even outside of the holiday season. Sadly, the most conservative movie for this Christmas season seems to be the bland comedy Have You Heard About the Morgans? Maybe you can find Astroboy still playing at a $1 theater. That was the most Randian film of this very Randian year—but that's an entry for another time. Until then, a very belated Happy Hanukkah, and Merry Christmas!

Sort of Suitable for Work

2009-12-08T05:21:00Z

I enjoyed spending some time with adult actress Lisa Ann last week. She's best known as the star of Who's Nailin' Paylin?, but I've been assured that conservatives wouldn't have any interest in that kind of thing. Instead, here's a pitch for the strangely wholesome Miss Jones. That link takes you to a wonderful site that "contains no nudity or material of a pornographic nature." What you get is plenty of lovely cheesecake shots of the accident-prone Miss Jones, who can never quite manage to keep her clothes from flying away in some sort of mishap. The free tour has plenty of pics that capture the nicely retro feel of the assorted photo shoots. It's certainly worth a visit for fans of Mad Men. I don't think Mad Men is a particularly right-wing show, but it seems popular with plenty of right-wing sites that wouldn't be interested in talking to Lisa Ann.

The Philadelphia Way

2009-11-30T16:14:00Z

This has been a particularly lousy year for celebrity deaths. Today, however, has Dick Clark making it to his 80th birthday. You won’t hear much celebrating from right-wing websites, though. That’s a shame, since America’s Teenager is also a proud conservative. His personal beliefs often came into play while he saved rock ’n roll during a few rough periods. Clark is more relevant than ever, too, as you can see by this old salute to his unjustly forgotten 45 “The Fable of Fun Country.” He was also there when things got less fun with the hippies in Wild in the Streets. There’s no guarantee that Clark will be here for our next New Year’s Rockin’ Eve, so let’s have some champagne while he’s still around.

Speaking of the New Year, entries here might actually become more frequent as 2009 comes to a close. I’ll probably use this site as a place to list my Year-End and Decade-End lists—except for one or two that will run as articles elsewhere. That isn’t to suggest that any of those deep thoughts are really worth more than a Twitter.

Death and…

2009-11-22T05:04:00Z

It was a pretty big deal when 1987’s The Monster Squad came out on DVD in 2007. The kiddie horror film had been a cable perennial that entertained plenty of now-grown latchkey kids. Fewer geeks noticed when all 13 episodes of 1976’s The Monster Squad were released this year. There seemed to be a lot less fondness for the short-lived Saturday morning TV series. That’s a shame, since the TV show was (and remains) corny kiddie fun with plenty of asides for the adults. (“A compact laser beam gun! It hasn’t been invented yet, but I use it anyway.”) The Monster Squad was also a tribute to the old Batman TV series, right down to wild art direction that bypasses psychedelia and heads straight into glam.

The high concept is that earnest young criminology student Walt (played by Fred Grandy) works nights at a wax museum. His innovative Crime Computer emits vibrations that animate the wax figures of Frankenstein, Dracula, and the Wolfman—played, respectively, by Michael Lane, Henry Polic II, and Buck Kartalian. The monsters want to make up for their infamous pasts by tracking down modern-day criminals. These include Queen Bee (Alice Ghostley), Music Man (Marty Allen), The Astrologer (Jonathan Harris), Ultra Witch (Julie Newmar), and The Weatherman (Avery Schreiber). The show had more than just prominent guest stars, though. The various henchmen also offer some fun surprises, including blonde bombshell Simone Griffeth as a fat woman at the circus run by the malevolent Ringmaster (Billy Curtis).

The Monster Squad also offers conservative indoctrination. Fred Grandy would later become a Republican Congressman, and he must have noticed that a few villains on the show are out to make their millions by taxing the public. There’s also an evil sheik, and The Weatherman tries to take over the world by threatening to manipulate the climate unless he’s elected President of the United States.

It’s no wonder that Walt can inspire classic bad guys to attempt doing some good. He's a sweetly old-fashioned guy who’s always ready to discuss virtues straight out of the 1950s. The Monster Squad is never so adult that the scripts mock Walt’s sincerity. Nobody probably needed more than the original 13 episodes, but the show is still something that any kid should enjoy—and subversive enough that the li’l tyke might learn not to trust politicians.

(Graphic courtesy of the fine Plaid Stallions website, which has a stellar tribute to The Monster Squad here.)

Country Life

2009-11-10T00:19:00Z

It doesn’t look like my Mac McAnally interview for Stomp & Stammer will be available online, so I’m putting the article up here. It’s a pretty interesting piece about a modest cult artist who’s written plenty of hits and recently became a chart-topping country artist. There’s not much political content, but here’s a link to a patriotic fan-made video for the first single from McAnally’s new Down by the River album. And here’s a McAnally quote that didn’t make the article, although it helps explain how the guy has spent a long career impressing both rednecks and the intelligentsia: “I’m always a little bit of a devil’s advocate. In Toby [Keith]’s circle, they all think I’m a liberal. When I’m with the [Jimmy] Buffett band, they all think I’m an emissary of Fox News.”

No Problem Here
Avoiding Attention Pays Off Just Fine for Mac McAnally

John Prine. Don Williams. Dean Dillon. Those are just a few of the great American songwriters who could be sitting anonymously in the chic lounge of a midtown Manhattan hotel. But none could be as anonymous as Mac McAnally, despite—or maybe because of—his stint this year as a #1 artist on the county charts. That came courtesy of proper star Kenny Chesney, who insisted that the songwriter share a performing credit after joining in a verse on the McAnally-penned “Down the Road.”

To be fair, McAnally’s taped appearance on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon hasn’t aired yet. Maybe somebody would notice him from that. McAnally certainly hasn’t changed since he made his self-titled debut album back in 1977. Maybe he’s a little less cherubic, but the massive mop of red hair and matching full beard is pretty distinctive. That’s the same distinctive face on the cover of his new album Down by the River.

Which, incidentally, isn’t what Mac was promoting on Jimmy Fallon’s show. He was appearing in his usual role as sideman to Jimmy Buffett.

“Yeah,” says McAnally, “I’ve been playing live with Jimmy since 1996. He gives me a little showcase in the middle of the concert, and we do a short acoustic set together. I’ve also been guesting with Kenny on some live dates. I’ll be doing some solo shows on nights off to promote the new album, and I’ve done a few interviews here in New York. It’s mostly been people who are just curious about why a guy my age is still around. Either that, or it’s people who go back to the beginning.”

That would be fans like myself, who were listening when “It’s a Crazy World” made it into the Top 40 as McAnally’s first single. It seemed like a promising start for a songwriter who was barely out of his teens. That was before 1978’s No Problem Here kind of bombed. Nobody cared that the twisted humor and sharp insight worked as a Southern-fried companion to Warren Zevon’s Excitable Boy. By 1980, RCA had signed McAnally up for the fine Cutting Corners. That one might have launched McAnally into the realm of lite-pop heroes like Michael Franks and Jim Photoglo.

But Cutting Corners didn’t sell, and the casual observer might have thought McAnally was set to join Dean Friedman and Starbuck as the quirkiest one-hit wonders of the ’70s. That’s when McAnally’s career became one of the more fortunate stories in rock ’n roll.

“The regime was changing at RCA,” explains McAnally, “and David Geffen came along and bought my contract. I knew RCA wouldn’t be pushing the album, but there was David telling me that he wanted to be an old-fashioned patron of the arts. He didn’t care if I was commercial or not. He just wanted to be connected with what I was doing. That was pretty inspiring. I remember writing ‘Old Flame’ on the way home from that meeting, which became a big hit on the country charts for Alabama. I was going every which way musically, but I knew that David Geffen was there wanting me to keep working.”

Geffen, of course, already had his plans to move from artist management to record mogul. McAnally would end up as the first act signed to the Geffen label.

“Actually,” McAnally notes, “there wasn’t even a Geffen Records yet. My contract was with ‘an as-yet-unnamed joint venture.’ It took me about three years to get the next record ready. Nothin’ But the Truth came out in 1982, and that was probably my biggest attempt at doing something that wasn’t natural. It’s nothing embarrassing. I was in love with a lot of Steely Dan records, so I was trying to expand my harmonic knowledge. I fooled around with a few things during the ’80s. By the time that Live and Learn came out in 1992, I was back to that narrative storyteller kind of thing.”

That stretch between Nothin' But the Truth and Live and Learn was also when McAnally became a popular country songwriter. He was having a fine time raising his children, hanging around the house, and thriving despite some classic industry woes.

“I had signed a contract at the beginning of my career,” he explains, “and now it’s framed on the walls of lawyers’ offices as the deal you shouldn’t sign. I was a teenager from Mississippi, so maybe I can be excused for signing this all-inclusive deal that covered management and production and everything else. But the way the publishing deal went, I owned the publishing rights to any of my songs that didn’t go on my albums. My publishing company was flourishing, and I was playing on sessions and getting to sing. Then I started producing bands. It gave me plenty to do while I was trying to work out my contract and make another album for Geffen.”

McAnally was also spared trying to launch a career in the video age. Things were tough enough for a burly and bearded redhead back in 1977. There wasn’t a stylist alive who could’ve gotten McAnally on MTV.

“Yeah,” agrees McAnally, “I was never going to be a visual artist. My heroes were literary guys. Flannery O’Connor was my big influence. Writers were third-person voices, so I never even thought of myself as being there in the song. You know, I grew up on a farm where you were told it’s a character flaw to draw attention to yourself. I’m not comfortable doing it now. Fortunately, that’s put more pressure on my songwriting to bring in whatever attention I can get.”

McAnally would wrap up the ’80s with the joint release of Finish Lines and Simple Life on, respectively, Geffen and Warner Bros. He wouldn’t be free from his contractual debts until he was released from MCA after 1994’s Knots. (“It’s good to know a friend’s doing you a favor when you’re dropped from a label.”) Geffen brought McAnally back for 1999’s Word of Mouth on DreamWorks, and then the songwriter went indie for 2004’s Semi-True Stories.

McAnally wrote plenty of hits for country artists during all this—but nothing suggested that he’d be topping the country charts as a performer in 2009.

“I’d written ‘Down the Road’ 21 years before on a Christmas morning,” McAnally recalls. “It was a very organic song, and making the record with Kenny was just as organic. He called me up and asked me to come over because he was going to record one of my songs the next day. He didn’t know which one. We decided to do ‘Down the Road,’ and Kenny asked me to join in the last verse as a duet. There wasn’t any A&R input, no drums, just me on two guitars and Erik Darken beating a wooden box. I never thought any of that would make me somebody.”

Fortunately, that fluke stardom would also lead to the release of Down by the River. McAnally’s dedicated fan base—and he has one—is used to waiting long years for a new album. Down by the River is yet another fine collection of catchy country-pop and gorgeous balladry. You also get a typically sardonic novelty tune, and one of McAnally’s genuine tearjerkers. In this case, it’s a salute to selflessness called “You First.”

“There probably wouldn’t be a new album if it hadn’t been for ‘You First,’” McAnally says. “I wrote that thinking it could be a big hit for someone, so I went to my manager—who’s also Toby Keith’s manager—asking him who I should pitch it to. He told me he’d listen to it and give it some thought. He called me back 20 minutes later saying, ‘You sing this. This is you.’ I told him that it wouldn’t be as big as a hit. He said he didn’t care, that I had to sing this song. Nobody had said that to me in a while.”

Typically, McAnally also had to be reminded that it’s a good idea for a #1 country artist to try putting out an album.

“I’m a hard worker as far as being a songwriter,” McAnally says, “or working in the studio, but I haven’t always been the best ambassador of my own work. I’m never going to be the kind of guy who seeks out the spotlight. When I’ve written something that sounds like a hit over the past 20 years, I hand off the baton to one of my buddies who has a bus payment and a personal trainer and a career already going. That’s worked out good for everybody.”

It’s worked out well enough for McAnally to join the Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame in 2007. McAnally also remains busy with other people’s tours and producing other people’s albums—ranging from Little Feat to ukulele whiz kid Jake Shimabukuru. It’s a busy career from a guy who could’ve long ago dropped out of the industry.

“It’s true,” agrees McAnally. “There’s every reason to think I’d be gone by now. I’ve received a couple of big honors over the past few years that all feel like Lifetime Achievement awards. You’re supposed to be finished after you get a few of those, but I feel like things are just starting. I realize I’m very blessed, and I can enjoy the process a lot more now—whether or not the audience knows who I am. But there are times when I wish I was a better guitar player.”

Sticking It to the Man for a Price

2009-10-30T17:51:00Z

I wish that I could call my recently-unearthed copy of At War With Society a curio of the 1990s. Instead, there are probably several variations of this 1998 compilation to be found in downloadable form. Anyway, here’s the liner notes to this collection of songs by proud Leftist punks such as Anti-Flag, UK Subs, and Reagan Youth:

Long bored with corporate mush? Instead of complaining, we opted to Fight Back with this act of commercial disobedience. Herein you will find a collection of recordings we are proud to have been involved with, in some capacity, over the last ten years. Too abrasive for the mainstream, these artists occupy the essential US underground. An underground. At War With Society.

Here’s what it says on the back of the CD:

Film & TV licensing inquiries: B.T. Music>>142 West End Ave., #23 W, New York, NY...

Dug

2009-10-20T23:47:00Z

This will be the only entry during the busiest week of a very busy month—and all I’m doing is endorsing The Vampire’s Assistant. Actually, the full title is either Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant, or The Vampire’s Assistant: The Cirque du Freak Saga Begins. I’m not sure yet. The important thing is that this teenage vampire tale is like going to see Twilight as directed by Herschell Gordon Lewis. Please don’t Google this Friday to see how many other writers have hacked out a similar line—although they’ll probably go with invoking Tod Browning.

There’s a lot to enjoy in The Vampire’s Assistant, but the most remarkable thing is a lack of moronic politics. The last film from co-writer/director Paul Weitz was 2006’s lousy American Dreamz. That comedy tried to explain that American soldiers are the real terrorists running around our country. To be fair, Weitz also co-directed 2002’s About A Boy, which remains an underrated film that goofs on aging hippies.

It’s still unexpected when the biggest creep in The Vampire’s Assistant turns out to be a high-school history teacher. We first see the character while he’s trying to force his ancient peacenik ignorance on his bored students. Then he attempts to shut down a touring freak show because the mere idea is so politically incorrect. One freak helpfully points out the teacher’s hypocrisy. That may not make for a lot of political content, but it’s certainly our kind of political content.

Also, there’s this young actress named Jessica Carlson who is easily the cutest girl to hit the big screen in a very long time. She gets even cuter once you find out why her character is hanging around with the freaks.

Farming Out

2009-10-15T23:06:00Z

As I see other writers regularly maintain their websites, I wish I’d saved my old t-shirt that said, “We Work for a Living, You Paper-Shuffling Prick!” The problem is that calling whatever I do for a living “work” would only disgrace my ancestors. I have been busy shuffling the pixels, though. Fortunately, Todd Seavey has been busier doing the kind of writing that used to occupy my time. His site has spent this week exploring the political ramifications of assorted post-apocalyptic action films and music videos. Sadly, Todd still refuses to take my advice and write a career-defining essay about the final scene of 1984’s Rats: Night of Terror. That’s probably because that would involve Todd watching a movie called Rats: Night of Terror.

I was particularly impressed by this recent entry, though. Todd makes a good case for how the original VHS reissues of the sordid Mondo documentaries might have convinced certain young idiots that Western culture is a pretty good idea. I was never too interested in those documentaries myself, mostly due to an adolescent trauma when Mondo Cane showed up in the middle of what was clearly billed as an all-night horror marathon. I wasn’t completely against documentaries, of course. I’d once sneaked into a movie theater to see one about the crowning of Miss Nude America.

Anyway, Todd's Mondo Magic entry is something that I should've written back in this site’s early days. Hopefully, I’ll continue to become even more redundant on the political front while making other contributions to society. For example, I’ll note that the Le Trapeze Swing Club will be showing the New York Yankees playoff games in their buffet area during their upcoming orgies. Now you can plan your weekend.

Eternal Vigilance

2009-10-06T17:02:00Z

Why, yes, I have been busy lately. I’m more baffled than ever by all these people who Twitter and blog while a mere heavily-researched 16,828 words ruins my week. Of course, I still find time to read. This week, I enjoyed Encyclopedia Brown Solves Them All—originally published in 1968, although my printing is from 1972. The title’s been constantly reprinted since then.

My kid is busy going through a big Berenstain Bears period, which is fortunate. I'll need time to weed out the Leftist messages in these Encyclopedia Brown stories. I shouldn’t be surprised. The Leftists have always been polluting pop culture. The more disturbing thing about the Encyclopedia Brown series is that the boy detective must’ve gotten his nickname by being the only 10-year-old in his neighborhood who could dress himself.

“The Case of Sir Biscuit-Shooter” is a good example of a mystery that could be solved by any vaguely sentient 7-year-old. It’s also a good example of author Donald J. Sobol’s bizarre insertion of politics into an otherwise mundane story. In this one, the circus has come to town, and Encyclopedia Brown has free tickets courtesy of his pal Lionel—whose Uncle Barney is a clown. Originally, though, Barney had another job. Here’s how that’s explained:

Encyclopedia knew about Lionel’s Uncle Barney. He had sold used cars, he had sold houses, and he had gone to prison for two years. Uncle Barney hadn’t cheated people more than most men who sold used cars or houses. But he had been caught.

I’ll probably never be a real-estate agent or used-car salesman. Still, I think I’ll boycott Encyclopedia Brown just out of respect for parents who dare to earn a living by non-creative and pro-capitalist means. No great loss for my kid, anyway. I’m more excited about introducing him to Alfred Hitchcock and the Three Investigators.

I’m not crazy about a midget Freddy Krueger, either…

2009-09-28T16:51:00Z

We’re supposed to be concerned about a real child molester today, but let’s consider the new trailer for the remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street. I knew that there was a reason for revamping the look of Freddy Krueger. Specifically, the new facial make-up for the legendary slasher was meant to look like an actual burn victim. I was told that this would make Freddy seem more sympathetic—which I took to be a nod to how some burn victims had once (reasonably enough) complained about how Freddy Krueger’s monstrous looks didn’t help their own rehabilitation.

I didn’t think that Freddy Krueger would need to look sympathetic because the Nightmare remake would present him as an innocent nice guy who was burned alive by a lynch mob looking for vengeance upon a child molester. For those who don’t remember, the Krueger of the ’80s series was definitely guilty when he was set on fire. That’s why it was so creepy when Freddy almost got an endorsement deal with Doritos.

Anyway, this new trailer strongly suggests that the Krueger of teenage nightmares began as a poor misunderstood soul. We got that with How the Grinch Stole Christmas, too. Also, consider that Nightmare co-scripter Wesley Strick wrote this film. The truth is probably that Krueger’s innocence will be determined by audience testing. Still, I’m curious to find out more about the character that’s being played by Clancy Brown. He’s the (really fine) actor you see leading the lynch mob hunting down Krueger at the beginning of the trailer. We’ll know where the script was going if Brown’s character turns out to be some kind of local family-values figure.

Invitation to an Illegal Download

2009-09-21T13:58:00Z

Check out this trailer to the animated feature Despicable Me, and marvel at how the filmmakers must hate the idea that their movie might be seen by pathetic rubes who didn’t even vote for Obama. I’d hope for a surprise twist, but it’s written by the same team who gave us the needlessly-politicized Horton Hears A Who! (The script was safely politicized from the Left, of course.) At least the trailer saves some of us money. We’re clearly disinvited from this family film.

The good news is that the trailer ran before the exceptionally fun Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs. That film’s evil mayor doesn’t have any kind of compulsive political content. Also, he’s voiced by Bruce Campbell.